Kelly Corrigan The Middle Place

Kelly Corrigan came into town this Saturday to do a book signing for Fountain Bookstore. I went to take pictures for the newsletter. Turns out she drew a large enough crowd that Kelly (of Fountain Bookstore) arranged to use one of the rooms at a nearby restaurant. So Kelly Corrigan actually talked for quite a while to the audience of thirty plus people. She is as entertaining in person as she is in her book.

One of the questions people seem to ask memoir writers most often is what did their mother, father, sibling, husband, etc. think of the book. Kelly said that when she finished her manuscript she gave it to her mother to read and told her mother that if there was anything she wanted taken out she would do this. For nine days she sat on pins and needles waiting. Mother finally called, "Kelly it's beautiful." Those three words healed their whole relationship. Was there anything Mom wanted taken out? The regifting maybe? No, what she wanted taken out was that Kelly got drunk when she was in high school. Why? Because that had happened on her mother's watch. To me that told so much about who her mother was and how her identity works. I have no idea who this woman is except what I've read in Kelly's book but I know what's important to her, that she raised her kids right. Kelly said of her mother, "She's not about what other people think of her." So the regifting was no big deal but what they thought of her kids, now that was another story.

I learned a lot about her writing process too. Apparently she had very little in the way of editing. "They just let me live and die on my own level." The thing the editors did do which was invaluable to her was to sit around and discuss her manuscript and then give her a summary of what they got out of it. Is that what she intended when she wrote that chapter? If it wasn't then Kelly would go back and rewrite the chapter for the effect that she wanted.

To write it she said, "you start by telling your stories, then you close your document, re-open it, and let the document tell you what it is about. Then you rerwrite it." You have to write 90% of it before you know what the book is about. What she learned from doing this is that when you put snippets of your childhood next to the adult experiences, it turns out the same things just keep happening under different circumstances.

Someone asked what her husband thought of the book. "It's income." In these stressful times he's happy to see a second paycheck in the family.

The Writing Show

It's becoming clear that I'm going to have to invest in learning to take indoor people photos and also invest in the equipment to take the photos with.

Unfortunately for me this particular session was a difficult one. It didn't seem to have any sense of cohesive thought or focus. All my notes are random ones that are nearly impossible to interpret into something with logical flow.

Eliezer Sobel discussed the various aspects of being a writer. Journalists write to inform. Diary entries are written as therapy. Spritiual writing needs to serve a more useful purpose. The first step is to, "make a distinction between our thoughts and who in our minds is aware of these thoughts." Second is to use writing to get past itself. Write until this voice, the critical one that is aware of the written word, is no longer heard. Finally when the spirit flows through you the words will flow out. This becomes Zen writing which is, "trying to serve that which is a spritual impulse."

Jeannette Drake talked about the best way to use dreams. Every night she tells herself that she will dream. When you're working on a project it will be in your dreams so that when you wake you need to pin point some aspect of that dream. Maybe it is a color, an emotion, a feeling, and then take that box and ask how is it related to the project I am working on.

Stephen Corey spoke about the aspect of writing which is often referred to as getting into the zone. The key to making this happen is to put yourself in a position to write. You have to allow some kind of shift to take place.

Eliezer told an amusing story about his experience as a writer. First the publisher had the book for a year. He would call them up every so often and inquire about the status and be told that they were interested, they just needed more time to think about it. Finally after a year passed he told them that's it, either take it or leave it. They got back to him. They didn't want it because the central character just doesn't hang together. When he got off the phone he laughed heartily. This was a memoir, he was the central character, and his life just didn't hang together.

Later on Eliezer's manuscript was picked up by a movie producer. She called him telling him how good this was, this was big, and she kept using the word big as she got more and more excited. She was only on the first chapter, she would take it with her on her vacation to Greece and get back to him from there. A couple weeks later he got a postcard, not a Greek one, a plain 3x5 white card that said she didn't like it and since she was on vacation she would just throw it away here. Eliezer had this image of all his pages floating on the Agean Sea.

Stephen told us about the time this woman got really mad at him about his poetry. It wasn't real? His poems were written about events that never happened! She was very angry because it was fiction. It set me to thinking about how we sometimes see poetry as merely an expression of our emotions and our lives rather than as stories. One of my favorite poems ever tells a story. Actually so does my second favorite. Poetry is how the bards would remember the tales in order to pass them on to the next generation.

Quotes:

Eliezer Sobel: "Language is how we interpret ourselves. We are languaging our lives into being."
Jeannette Drake: "This prayer was not supposed to stay in my house."
Stephen Corey: "Poets never use the words agents and money."

Robotics

Well it's hard to top the last post as far as stories of the robotics competition go. Friday and Saturday didn't have quite the dramatic moments. For one I forgot to pay attention to the scores. I like to photograph so this is what I was doing while their robots were on the field. I also liked to turn around and see if there were any great moments written on the kid's faces. I wasn't able to catch any so that was a bit of disappointment. Not that there weren't intense moments, I just didn't catch them in pixels.

Friday was a disappointing day for other reasons too. As I recall they either lost all their matches or didn't score enough points to have qualified. Something along those lines. As you can imagine with 40 kids on the team they couldn't all be working on it at once. So a lot of these kids were doing things in between competition rounds. The main organizers play music all day long and it is fast paced dance music to keep your heart revved up and rhythm going. At one point they had a disco song about a train, doing the locomotion? The tallest member of our team seemed to be a natural leader. Next thing you know he's got eighty plus kids in a train weaving around the stands, through the stands, in the lobby. It wrapped around and around and around. Then they would do the electric slide and the adults would get involved. It was a blast of spontaneous communication between people from all the different teams.

Costumes reign. Mascots are in. Most importantly, the robots are tested. Did the theory that defensive strategy was a winning strategy pan out? Did the use of eight wheels when everyone else used fewer ones give us an advantage? Was that fickle brain pickled? Sigh, at the end of the day we are ranked near the bottom. Did that hinder the kid's spirits? No way. Karaoke at the Science Museum. We have budding rock stars on the team.

Saturday. Well by this time I was reminded that I'm over forty and two decades away from those energetic years when I could have dance music blasting its way into my brain and feel energized. I was now exhausted. I was also ready to try some experimental photography. Fortunately the Technoromancers were not first on the list to play. Oh did I tell you that's our robot's name? So I walked around trying to find a way to do something called panning. If done successfully this would make the robot be in focus while everything around it was blurred as if it is moving really fast. It's also very difficult to achieve. So I set up the tripod everywhere trying to figure out how to make this work. I finally found an acceptable place way high up in the bleachers and I would zoom in. The practice shots came out okay but that was about it. Just when the Technoromancers took the field, wouldn't you know it, the giants for human beings that were seated right in front of me, stood up with video cameras. I almost cried. As a matter of fact I went to the media table with tears in my eyes and pleaded with them to please let me have a media pass for just one round. They did.

Oh wait, did I mention that the robot won that round? That's what one of the mentor's told me. Poor Sadie halfway through his explantion of how this game works and where they were in the rankings he figured out my eyes were glazing over. Speaking of Sadie did you know that when Qimonda folded most of the mentors left our robotics team? Sadie stayed. We owe him a round of appreciation.

So after I pleaded with tears in my eyes for the media pass they let me borrow one. I took several photos in a practice round. They were great and I full of anticipation. When our robot came on the field I snapped away like this was digital and it didn't cost me a dime, well it was digital, but it does cost a lot of time to sort through all those blurred photos to find the one good one. At one point I knew I had it. I had the robot flying by in focus while the background was blurred. I was so excited I was jumping up and down nearly screaming like I'd just won the world. The kids were too. Later one of them told me, "we wondered what you were excited about." They were excited about winning. Technoromancer was a beauty or a stud, are robots he's or she's? Alas Friday's defeats meant we were still not up high in the rankings but Saturday's wins meant we had a chance at being picked by another team to be a part of their alliance. It didn't happen. By noon the competition was over for Technoromancer. Did this put a damper on the kid's spirits? Oh no. They did the YMCA song, lead a train past the judges giving them high fives along the way, and talked to other teams who didn't make it.

Robotics

Here is the story of our first day:


Thursday is the first day of competition. Three kids arrive at the Siegel Center and uncrate the robot. Only three kids are allowed and that is one of the First Robotics rules (the name of the Virginia Regional Robotics organization) and then it's open to the rest of the kids to come in and help at eight-thirty. That's when organized chaos begins. What condition is the robot in? Did it get damaged during shipment? As luck would have it ours was fine but the brain wasn't! It had missed its metal heart and let its circuits slide. The programmers went to work. There were yet more snags called rules. The rule is you can't use a laptop. Time is ticking away. Fortune's smile was fading as our time to go out on the floor came up fast. Another robotics team came along and offered to help. This unnamed girl -- who was the caped crusader? -- saved the day. She was given a much coveted top hat with gears. Thank you, thank you.

Now the robot had brains but low and behold the wheels were sliding and the bumpers didn't seem to sit right. Tick tock, tick tock. The way the competition works is that the teams must que up before their match and they have 5-6 teams on each side (blue vs red) so that as one competition is ending, the other is beginning less than three minutes later. First Robotics runs a tight show. So when they call you to que up you have to be there in line. The machine wasn't working.

"CJ quick go get in line and tell them we're coming." CJ held our place.
"Load this thing on the cart, we've got to have a safety inspection sticker in order to compete and we've haven't been inspected yet."
"There isn't time! Look where CJ is standing in line."
"Well we can't compete then. The rules are enforced."
"Hang in there." Comes the calm voice, "let's just see if we pass."

Off they race to the inspection center. The robot is slipped into the giant metal box and it must fit within that box with the theoretical door closed or it doesn't pass, period. First they weigh it. It can't weigh more than 120 pounds and -- whew -- it weighs 108.8. What? We have to add the trailer hitches too? Oh, groan, how much do they weigh? Barely less than twelve pounds. Thank those fates and those kids who calculated as best they could without scales to weigh their robot. Now it goes into the box. Uh oh. There is a hair, a fraction so small it only Tom Thumb could measure it, that is sticking out of the box. 1/64ths of an inch. Oh, the agony. The inspector slides the aluminum bar down the exterior of the box and it sticks on this little fraction of the robot.
"Look we passed safety, quick tell the drivers to take the controls and get in line with CJ. We can fix this."

They push the robot tighter into the box. They try and readjust its position. Sigh, it isn't working. They did pass inspection though so technically they're allowed to play today since today is merely trial runs. If they don't fix that 1/64th of an inch though before tomorrow...but of course they will.

Quick run the robot back to the pit and let's get those bumpers back on. Opps, forgot to mention the robot is measured before the bumpers are attached. So off they roll that cart. Back in the pit they're frantically trying to attach the bumpers but the nuts won't go in! They just keep sliding out of the wood. What now, what now? Someone find some zip ties and tie those bumpers off until after the first round that way we can at least see how the robot behaves on the field. Ties? Who has the ties? These are too small. Think, think, think. Snap two of them together.

"Come on guys, CJ is now just two robots away from being called to the field." That's less than 5 minutes. Tick Tock! TICK TOCK!

On the bumpers go. Get that robot on the cart and get in line!
"The safety sticker, we don't have the safety sticker!"
They run back over to the safety inspection station for that final check that the bumpers are securely attached.

The drivers are standing alone next to their alliance's robots anxiously watching the inspection from afar. Seconds, there are only seconds until Robot 1599 is being called to roll out on the field. Where is Robot 1599?

"We have the sticker!"

They roll the robot into the waiting area just as the bell sounds to end the previous competition round. Without even stopping they roll their cart to the arena's edge and lift the robot onto the field.

"Yes! Yes! We did it! We're in play."

The bell sounds and the robots roll. Groan, Robot 1599 just sits there accepting moonrocks (and the other side scores!). What's the matter? What now?

The bell rings a second time and the drivers are allowed to leap forward and take the controls. Robot 1599 is happy and races into the fray. Zoom, zoom across the field it goes. Moonrocks fly everywhere and some are dumped from other robots into trailers. On we go. The bell rings. The round is over. Who won? These are trial runs, they don't keep score. Back to the pit the robot goes for more adjustments.

Robotics

I've spent the last two days and will spend all day tomorrow at something called Robotics. It is this competition where these high school kids build robots and they battle it out in an arena. The entry fee is $6,500. You know who pays that? A lot of big name companies that sponsor these high school kids to play with robots. I was stunned. I was even more astonished when I read the Richmond Times Dispatch article in today's paper about the different robotics teams in the Richmond area. Most of them are like us and really struggling to find the sponsors and therefore the money they need for next year. Qimonda went out of business. A bunch of other organizations went out of business and now, well, we don't know what we're going to do. Anyway the article mentioned that Deep Run isn't having any trouble financially. They have $39,000 to start off with for next year.

On so many different levels this is an incredible experience for my son. He is interacting with older high school students in a positive way. He is included in the group. They're all astonished by his computer programming skills. I am so glad this is working out for him and I so hope the money comes next year.

Anyway, I'm a bit preoccupied with photography. I've taken 400 photos today and 250 yesterday. So far I'm not getting anything I'm happy with because the light is low, flash doesn't work well, and I don't have a camera that can do extraordinary things in low light. This photo shows where all the robots are clustered together in the center of the stage trying to push each other to the sides where team members can toss the balls into their trailers (baskets essentially) and win points.

I'll leave you with the bit of wisdom I overheard a teacher say, "It's harder to teach someone who knows something than it is to teach someone who knows nothing."

Puzzling water drops

You can see my world reflected in this water drop. It's not a particularly green world at the moment. The most profound thing I have to say isn't even mine, it belongs to Madison. A democracy is a tyranny of the many over the few. A monarchy is the tyranny of the few over the many. Did you know that until about two hundred years ago democracy was a bad word? It wasn't viewed as some great and noble endeavor that enlightens people and brings about equality, it was seen as just that a tyranny. This is why we have a republic instead of a democracy no matter what the press calls this government. We do not make each and every decision for our nation, we elect representatives to do this for us, and we trust they will make the right decision.

The problem is, they don't make the right decision. Madison said that in that case you vote them out of office. Okay, that works if you're the majority, but what about the minority? What happens when eighty-percent of the people want something, say a high rise office building in New York city and two percent don't want that because it means their lives are lost? It become a tyranny of the many over the few because the many simply take it away from the few. The interesting part to me though is that it isn't so much the many, as it is a representative of the many, in other words, the few that take from the few in the name of the many. Getting confusing?

Think of the Kelo affair. The mayor said this is what the many want. The ones who owned the property argued that no it isn't. The problem is that the many didn't vote the mayor out of office because she advocated for their interests, maybe not just the high rise office building but other things too. Besides what do you want to throw out a perfectly good mayor for because she is abusing her power over one person? There must be something wrong with the one person who doesn't want to sacrifice her life, the one she worked so hard to obtain, in the interests of the greater good for the many people. So voting someone out of office just because she abuses her power over one person isn't going to happen. What kind of appeal does one person who represents only herself have against another person who represents the majority but the truth is the majority has no idea what their representative is doing because they have abdicated their power? So these representatives have tremendous power to abuse because they do so in the name of the many.

Toss in the judicial system that is supposed to protect the interests of the one against the many. Umm, the many are writing the laws. So the many write laws that work in their favor.

I don't know, it seems like a giant puzzle and the pieces are complicated.

The Writing Process

I belong to the older generation that grew up on television rather than computers. Back when I was a kid if you missed the Charlie Brown Special, you missed it, period. You didn't see it again for a whole year. In those ancient days communication was always between friends and limited to scribbled notes passed when the teacher wasn't looking. We didn't have cell phones to text with or blackberries that would make us smarter than a fifth grader. So I learned to write on paper with a pencil that could only be erased a couple times before the paper eroded away.

Now days I communicate with a lot of people instantly. Like most people who have learned a new technology I've had my moments, that e-mail I shouldn't have sent or the blog post I wished I hadn't published. Unlike paper you can't erase until the message is obliterated and hope that The Gossip only tells a few people. Experience teaches you that The Gossip only hangs out in the hallways for a short time, people lose interest, and it's forgotten. E-mails and blog posts sit around like skeletons in the closet waiting for the Day of the Dead to rise again.

Because of the way I grew up and this new communication technology came into my life I write in two very different manners. On paper I'm a lot more free with my words. Paper can be shredded before anyone ever sees it. This allows me to think more internally about emotions and conflicts that maybe I wouldn't want to risk ever coming to light. When I write on my novel using pen and paper it works the same way. The words that flow aren't dialog or intense physical action but more description in particular I tend to tie the events into a character's psyche using more literary phrases. The paragraphs read like mint julep on a summer afternoon with the smell of barbecue in the air.

When I write on a computer the words look like they do in a book. This intimidates me. I think, "these words don't deserve courier font." I tend to use a lot of dialog and action because this is an external way of telling a story. These words will be published. No matter that I can hit the delete button and they "disappear." Have you ever watched the CSI or FBI shows and learned that they can read a hard drive that's been in a fire? Criminals can find what you thought you erased. The government can. You know that person who you want to keep a secret from can. Never type a word that isn't publishable.

So when I write my novel it goes back and forth constantly. I sit at the table and watch the birds eat seeds on my deck and I write the crazy preacher's sermon and the character's thoughts as she internalizes his words. I sit at the computer and write the dialog between two characters as one resists arrest, breaks an arm, and eventually is subdued. Sometimes I sit at the table and write the emotional build up that comes when the kid's anger boils. Then I go to the computer and write the scene where he burns the school down.

I have no idea if this is the right formula. The words are not piling up in my manuscript. The story doesn't have the conflict it needs to be a story. The emotional arc is undeveloped. Deep down inside though I know this is the manuscript that will be my first published novel. Why?

Those thoughts are on paper. They are private. One day I will put them in a computer and eventually in a blog post but at the moment they need to be somewhere that I can trust. (Not that the FBI wants to break in and read my manuscript. My sister and I have a running joke that they tapped my line and then died of boredom)

Encyclopedia Britannica

So I was searching my library this morning and saw this book on the shelf Encyclopedia Britannica. I pulled it off the shelf, something I never would have done if all my books were in a kindle. So is this a good thing or a bad thing? I'm not even sure I would have this book in my kindle. I only bought it because it was a dollar at a yard sale and I have a fondness for reference books.

Anyway, I flipped through the book just in case it did have a reference to the topic which began my search. Remember that slight obsession I have with words (no I don't play scrabble but maybe I should)? Well there this entry on Burning and it said, "Burning, or Brenning in our old customs, denotes infectious disease, got in the stews by conversing with the lewd women, and supposed to be the same with what we now call the venereal disease." This was written in the 1788-1797 edition of the encyclopedia. In the 1992 reprint that I'm holding it notes, "Stews by the way are what we now call whorehouses." pages 91-92.

Interesting huh? Because these are just ordinary words now, they don't have the implications other words have such as gay.

So in defense of the kindle I looked at their "buy-me" video. It does look enticing. Apparently you can get a lot of books in e-book format not just the self-published ones. It must be the people I hang out with because all those writers from JRW are published in paper and they all seem to think that e-publish is self-publish and I didn't bother to actually look into the whole subject to find out more. All I could think about was being able to read some of the books I know I'll never read again nor do I want to keep on my shelf -- you know the beach reads -- for less than the $27 hard cover price. That would be nice because I never get to the library in time to reserve a copy and by the time I get around to buying the paperback the sequel has come out.

Now my question is, "How do they prevent people from stealing the e-books?"

Pocket e-books

Would you pay $359 for a book? Not a rare one, a new one. Well that's how much the second generation Kindle cost and I'm guessing you have to buy the books that go on the device. Here we are in a tight economy and everyone is talking about how the publishing world is changing. E-books are the newest thing because they cost little to produce and unless I'm mistaken you can self-publish an e-book. So I'm going to pay more than $350 for a self published book? Or do you buy e-books and read them elsewhere, like say your computer.

What bothers me most about this technology is not so much that it is expensive it's that your paying all this money and there is nothing to hold. Nothing goes on a book shelf as a conversation starter. Many times I have shown someone my bookcase and had them pull off a book and start discussing it with me. What if a book goes out of print and the technology to read that book also goes out like say IBM punch cards. Where would research go to find out information? There is a book that is over a hundred and fifty years old. I would love to get my hands on a copy but like the kindle it's more than $350. Is it a profound book? No, it's isn't some great philosopher or signed by George Washington. It's this man who went around the Shenendoah and recorded things like how to butcher a hog.

Even though the technology for printing and binding books has changed in the last 150 years the words have not. Fortunately for me I can get electronic copies of this book. But what if it had been written in ancient German, the one that existed before Hitler culled out all German dialects except his chosen one. Finding a translator would be hard to come by. The greater the difficulty to obtain information the greater the loss to general public like me who won't spend the time and money to hunt down a translator just to learn how to butcher a hog so I can make my story seem real for the reader. So what if these e-books are never put into any medium except one and this one becomes like the ancient German, defunct.

Well you've lost a lot of poorly written unedited self published books. You've also lost that Grandma who told tales about growing up in the Great Depression, The Great War, or whatever it was about her life she decided she had to record before she died. I think what bothers me the most is that there is no tactile appreciation for what you hold in your hands. If the book is old and crumbling you know you're going to learn about the past as it was written during it's time which is very different from learning about the past as it is rewritten during our time. Also do authors sign kindle books? What do they type their name in or something? Oh, wait they sign the receipt where you bought it. No, I take that back, they electronically sign the e-mail confirmation that the e-book is in your mailbox.

Even if there is a major storm and you have no power for ten days you can still read a book. But what if the batteries die on your Kindle? Better yet what if they die two pages before you find out who dunit?

Richmond Snow

By Saturday it is supposed to be seventy degrees around here. I love the snow and it is certainly beautiful to look at but it is restricting. I need to get out and work on the yard.

Richmond Snow

It snowed here in Richmond. I've spent the day taking pictures of birds but I will post those later if any of them are any good. The birds are desperate for food. So much so that as I am spreading seeds they swoop down and take them. They aren't even waiting for me to go inside. The robins are so desperate for water they will light on the bird bath (I keep warm water in it) while I'm standing at the door. This is unusual for them.

The bottom picture was taken from my second story window and you are seeing the tops of the trees from on high.

Robin Invasion

We had a flock of Robins come to the yard earlier today. I mean a hundred or so. It was tough to get those kinds of numbers in one photograph to prove what I'm saying. Instead I hung out of my second story window and took pictures of them eating the holly berries on my tree.